Saturday, June 21, 2008

pursuit of happiness

when i lost my dad, i lost everything..
now i try to keep what i have left...
and try to get what i used to have...
seems to be impossible..
...

no man could love me like my dad did..

maybe what i need is just to grow up..
and act like an adult..
.. and wake up .. face the reality..
its soo stupid.. and im stupid!!
i hate that...

i should be walking like other people..
.. maybe i do walking.. but im walking alone..
and these people who are walking next to me..
are soo nasty and bothering..
stupid people!!.. and stupid me.. !!
i shouldnt let them bother me!!..

i just wanna be happy...

my dad was funny and annoying..
the most annoying person in this world..
he liked to tease me trying to piss me off..
.. but when my dad happy.. it made me happy too..
.. i miss my dad...
i was never run to my dad when something bad happened to me..
.. but when my dad died.. it was like i lost the center of my world..
when the world is spinning.. i got bothered, and i feel alone..
like i have nobody..

i am so stupid..
too stupid to be happy,.. and too stupid to be grateful for what i have now...

8 comments:

mizan said...

PERTAMAX....

Seize the day of your life...

h4rs said...

mmm read this...
"Be grateful for whoever you are"
"Coz if u compare it to others,"
"U'll be surprised of their secret life"

you're not alone.. but your mind created feel like that....

ohh my god I'm grammar english hahahahahahaahah may be not perfect but i'm pride heheheheheheheh

-f- said...

ehm...
you're not alone.. masih banyak temen2, dan masih ada keluarga.
jadi jangan lupa sayangi yang masih ada.

*trus ngakak baca komen acak-kadutnya hars*

arrie said...

kehilangan itu sulit diterima, tp sulit bahkan tak bisa dikembalikan lagi. jadi, musti diterima, dan itu jd motivasi untuk menyayangi yg masih ada, benul kata mbak F..

teresa said...

Ning, we don't have to be "smart" to be grateful... but being grateful is certainly a really smart thing to do. :) love and happiness is in the air, we just need to inhale deep enough to feel it.

Nining Sutrisnaningsih said...

@mizone: tlimakasih

@hars: wew.. gaul banget loe..
tp tlimaksih atas salannya..
dan jika ditelaah.. nasehatmu kie menyarankan aku menggunakan pengendalian pola pikir.. seperti cara dietmu..

@fany: iya fan.. mencuba mempertahankan yang saya masih punya...

@arrie: iya.. awalnya nerima.. terus kadang masih terasa.. embuh kie.. ternyata aku wonge suka bergantung kali ya...

@terresa: nice words mbak...
just sometimes.. i have these moments.. waking up from my sleep and find me alone.. wew..

ninaz said...

happiness lies somewhere...bahkan nongkrong dg sohibmu dan ngobrol cengengesan ra penting sekalipun bisa jadi kebahagiaan tersendiri...people who will always be there for you no matter what...yang membantumu lolos dari lubang jarum paling kecil sekalipun...tapi ternyata kadang kau lupa ada orang2 seperti mereka di sekelilingmu...jenenge menungso...ora maido...panjalukane neko2...

*opo to ki

Nining Sutrisnaningsih said...

@nina: turnuwon komene nin.. pangucapanmu kuwi ugo ono benere.. sanalan koyo mengkono... aku kadang feeling alone.. opo goro gorone aku sak pindahe ning jeporo yo..

jane kie.. goro goro Bapakku sedo, mamahku pindah omah ngisor..

dan segalanya berubah.. rumah bymk sudah tidak seperti rumahku dulu..